My Club 33rd Degree Birthday

 It's still over a month away, a mystical and very special day for me... my 33rd birthday...  It is my very own special Club 33, it is my own highest 33rd degree!


I wanted to do something grand to celebrate.  I wanted to invite everyone, and maybe have a party at a restaurant, a banquet hall, or just get extravagant in my own home...  On the other hand, I wanted to get out of here, go to New York, or New York casino in Las Vegas... either way...  Or take a road trip up to the redwoods...  Maybe south to Cabo....


And finally I thought about just doing the Christmas thing with my family, driving around to see everyone....


Finally I looked inward to myself and I decided I want to stay home for Dec. 25th.  I am going to put up a tree, and decorate the house.  I have no kids, but I have never done this.  The last house we lived in was a condo and it wasn't the same, but this is our first house together for sure.... it is definitely my first house that I own.  I turn 33 on the first yule Robert and I spend together.


I decided to just stay here.  I don't want to go to anyone, though if they wish to come to me that is fine.  And I will have an open invitation to anyone who wants to celebrate with me to come through and bring some food and drink to share, though I do not expect anyone.


My pagan friends are few and my atheist ones fewer.  My siblings all have other commitments and their family life is split so many ways.  My dad won't come to San Diego right now due to his own matters and I will see him for TG anyway.  I anticipate my mom will come, and I anticipate my friend Lexi would come too.  My neighbors will come.  And that may be it this year.


I will not get to celebrate the way I would ideally want to.  I wanted to have a sacred experience to how I understand or believe it to be, but I am alone in that believe, and that is okay.  I will like candles on a cake, and I will celebrate with a few, but the significance of this event remains the same greatness...  I turn 33, on 12-25-2014.  I even like the date.  I like the numbers.


25 was important to me...  30 was important, and 33 is definitely important.


A change I have already started, I will practice what I preach and eliminate what does not serve me... habits, limit certain relationships, and I will go after what I want with love in my heart and passion.  There is a new element this year too, my professional life is back to a path I had strayed from, and I intend to excel to shocking levels.  33 will be a year of tremendous transformation for me, and of great joy because I choose for it to be so.


No outside circumstance rules me, and my days of struggle are far behind.  That is the choice I am making.  I will seek out mentors to aid me.  I will distance myself from those who try to hold be back.  I choose to be unleashed. I choose to be unstoppable.


I've always been, we all are.  The difference is I still allowed myself to hesitate, to doubt, to listen to my negative thoughts and those of others, and even if I would end up quieting them, I still hesitated.  Life is too short for that, and it is time I prove to myself what I have always known to be true about me.


So, over a month away, but I am looking forward to 33.