2020 has been a bummer year for most everyone, but I can see it's actually been a good year. When the pandemic hit, and the world shut down, our planet had a chance to breathe. This was an opportunity for all to see just how much we affect things. Human Rights issues have come up not just with the Black Lives Matter movement, but Native peoples are being heard in their cry for justice. 2020 is indeed a humbling year, and we've lost much but we have the opportunity to be better. For me, I lost one of my beloved canines. Penelope lost her battle with cancer and died in my arms. She was survived by Sophia and Artemis and the three cats, Kimber, Nagisa, and Snow ball... and myself. I miss her, and life goes on. I have her ashes and the memory of her. I let go of a relationship which though is had a lot of beauty and fun to it, had become so very heavy on my emotional and psychological well being. The guilt I have is due to knowing that he is willing to fight for me, and
My mom asked me today if I've been depressed since she's moved in. She added the question if I feel that she's taking up my home. I told her that I haven't had time to be depressed. The other day I had some thoughts creep in and I was going to take a moment to process them and reject them. I didn't even get a chance for that because when I realized that I was having negative thoughts I was interrupted by the sound of her singing opera from the kitchen. It didn't oi me for a split second, but it was followed by laughter right away. So tell me, how is that a bad thing? She's taking up the space that I would feel with negativity and she's replacing it with laughter. And that's what it's all about. No one else could do that for me right now. But my mom can.