So I was doing fine, losing weight, slimming down... slowly, properly...
January decided to be fat month. And while I am not heavier or bigger than my clothes allow for, I decided to stop being so damn accepting of myself.
Yes I love myself, I love my curves, I even love my chubbiness believe it or not... so am I happy with myself? No.
Why not? Is it self esteem issues? Did the media get to me and now I think I should be stick thin? F no!
I do not accept my current health and weight because I do have self esteem. Because I know my potential and am 100% confident I can reach it. I do not want to be a gym rat, I hate working out. Let me be honest here. It's fun to do from time to time but I hate routine, and hate the idea of having to workout to a routine.
So my solution is to have more fun to lose weight.
What? But how does having fun cause weight loss? Well to me it is fun to go for a walk, to ride my bike, to cook a delicious meal, to go to the beach and go splash around, to play with my dogs at the dog park, to play roller hockey with Robert, to garden, to fix the house up, to landscape, to build things (which I need to do around the house), to go kayaking, etc...
If that isn't an active lifestyle I don't want one.
I've been doing great this year thus far and it's only 18 days in. hit my goal to have the portion of the house organized which I wanted by today, but I have a couple weeks to meet the next one of having the entire house 100% organized and neat.
Then it's the storage shed and the yard, plus micro goals along the way.... that's just with the house.
I have goals for my career. I have goals for my health. I have goals for my hobbies. I have goals for my dogs!
Now a days when I sit to rest, I get anxious.
One of my biggest goals which I tend not to mention cause I feel most can't relate or understand is music.... It isn't my number one priority, I admit that, but it is #2. #1 is my happiness, and before you call me selfish, my happiness means my family being set which means Robert and the animals being set.
If I mean my goals, I can have it all, so I have no time to waste because I do want it all... and by all I mean all I want so I don't actually want it all if you think of everything I can have. I want my music studio, my art studio, my travels, and my home life a certain way and to a certain level, and I believe in myself enough to get it done. I always have, but this year I am putting more urgency into it, and I am gonna go light speed.
Yes I love myself, I love my curves, I even love my chubbiness believe it or not... so am I happy with myself? No.
Why not? Is it self esteem issues? Did the media get to me and now I think I should be stick thin? F no!
I do not accept my current health and weight because I do have self esteem. Because I know my potential and am 100% confident I can reach it. I do not want to be a gym rat, I hate working out. Let me be honest here. It's fun to do from time to time but I hate routine, and hate the idea of having to workout to a routine.
So my solution is to have more fun to lose weight.
What? But how does having fun cause weight loss? Well to me it is fun to go for a walk, to ride my bike, to cook a delicious meal, to go to the beach and go splash around, to play with my dogs at the dog park, to play roller hockey with Robert, to garden, to fix the house up, to landscape, to build things (which I need to do around the house), to go kayaking, etc...
If that isn't an active lifestyle I don't want one.
I've been doing great this year thus far and it's only 18 days in. hit my goal to have the portion of the house organized which I wanted by today, but I have a couple weeks to meet the next one of having the entire house 100% organized and neat.
Then it's the storage shed and the yard, plus micro goals along the way.... that's just with the house.
I have goals for my career. I have goals for my health. I have goals for my hobbies. I have goals for my dogs!
Now a days when I sit to rest, I get anxious.
One of my biggest goals which I tend not to mention cause I feel most can't relate or understand is music.... It isn't my number one priority, I admit that, but it is #2. #1 is my happiness, and before you call me selfish, my happiness means my family being set which means Robert and the animals being set.
If I mean my goals, I can have it all, so I have no time to waste because I do want it all... and by all I mean all I want so I don't actually want it all if you think of everything I can have. I want my music studio, my art studio, my travels, and my home life a certain way and to a certain level, and I believe in myself enough to get it done. I always have, but this year I am putting more urgency into it, and I am gonna go light speed.
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Jamul, CA, USA
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